


Can I hold your hand?

by misswritingobsessed



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Comfort, F/M, Family, Friendship, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-21
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-05 11:39:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16367177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misswritingobsessed/pseuds/misswritingobsessed
Summary: “Can I hold your hand? You make me feel safe, and I think I need the comfort and support just as much as you do.”





	Can I hold your hand?

**Author's Note:**

> I know for a fact this is pretty crappy, but the idea was in my head, so I wrote it.  
> Very much a/u, Julia survives the explosion.

Julia wasn’t sure how long it’d been. She wanted to check the time, check her watch, see how long she’d been sat in the waiting room, but she couldn’t bring herself to move. She felt too guilty, too sick, too worried. It should have been her. She should be the one in the operating theatre, not Kim. 

She’d heard the faint conversation between David and Tom. Lorraine Craddock was on her way with Kim’s parents, more protections officers were going to come to take Julia home. 

“I’d like to stay,” she hated how quiet her voice was when she spoke, her throat felt like sandpaper, she tried swallowing hard to get rid of the scratching, but she knew it would be a while before the reminders of the blast went away.

“You’re still a target, ma’am.” Julia heard David speak before she felt him sit down in the chair next to her. She had to admit, she’d grown use to the safety and comfort she felt whenever he was around, so much so that she felt physically empty without him being within reaching distance. 

She hasn’t realised how close her three protection officers were until Kim had stopped breathing. 

“I want to make sure she’s okay, and right now I don’t think leaving either of you would be a good idea.” Julia glanced over at Tom who gave a single nod.

“I’m going to call the Chief Superintendent, see what her ETA is. I’ll inform the other officers that Lavender is staying put.” Tom said before leaving the room, leaving David and Julia alone.

“David.”

“You’re okay, Julia. You’re safe.” He could tell the moment she said his name that she was close to breaking point. 

Julia didn’t want to say anything else, her throat was still dry, and her words would only be pathetic pleas for David to make all of this go away as if he had such a power. 

Reaching out the Home Secretary took the hand of her bodyguard, squeezing it only gently. 

“I told you, my job is to protect you.” 

Julia looked up at him, and David noticed the same vulnerability he did when they stood in the hotel room after the shooting, that look of vulnerability that made him lose sight of him job for a few hours, that started this love affair that was still ongoing.

“And I told you, I want you right beside me. I meant that David.” She gave his hand another gentle squeeze and resisted the almost overwhelming urge to lean over and kiss him.

“Right now, I am your PPO, my job is to ensure you are safe. Right now, I need to make sure Kim is okay.”

Julia nodding in understanding, she couldn’t blame him, she’d once been close to people she’d spend all night in a hospital waiting room for. 

She turned back, finally looking up at the clock. It had been four hours. She, just like the other, was prepared to wait another forty.

Julia kept hold of his hand. When Lorraine walked in, when Kim’s mum started crying, when the nurses came with updates, when Counter Terrorism officers came to talk to her, she kept hold of David’s hand, silently refusing to let go.

David kept her safe, and she needed that. He was right, she was still a target and having him hold her hand was the closest to laying in his arms she was going to get right now. 

After another hour or so, she found herself left alone with David once again.

“Would you give this up for me?” It was a question that had been playing on her mind, through her speech, through the ride to the hospital, really since they first spent the night together. She was too selfish to give up her own job, she had to know if he would give up his.

“In a heartbeat. If I knew that it wouldn’t completely ruin my life and destroy your career.” 

He had a point. So far, she’d escaped death twice, physically of course, she wasn’t sure how lucky she would be when it came to a scandal. 

“I guess having you protect me will be the closest we can get until someone figures us out.” Julia told him, watching as a small smile appeared on his lips and he turned to face her properly.

“You’ve been holding my hand for the last few hours, if they haven’t put two and two together by now, then I would be very concerned that they’re not doing their job properly.” 

She tried to hide the blush the was creeping up her neck and onto her face.

“David, I,” 

“We’ll talk about it later,” he said, and Julia could tell by his voice that this wasn’t the right time or place for the conversation that could affect both their futures. 

“Can I hold your hand? You make me feel safe, and I think I need the comfort and support just as much as you do.” She gave an unnecessary explanation.

“Of course, ma’am.” 

More hours passed. More crappy cups of coffee, more hours of Tom pacing and Lorraine trying to reassure them all, hours of nurses explaining that Kim was still in surgery, but she hadn’t gotten any worse, hours of David and Julia sitting so close together, holding hands, looking like the concerned loved ones, that in the moment, they were.

“Mrs Knowles,” Everyone in the room looked up, moments later standing up when a doctor in scrubs walked into the room.

Julia held her breath, she didn’t want to lose Kim, not only was she her protection officer, but she was still young and clearly loved, and she didn’t know if she could go on knowing that it should have been her.

Her hand never left David’s as they stood there.

“She’s going to be just fine. It was a long process, but Kim is a fighter, right now I would say she is going to make a full recovery.”

Julia wasn’t sure she’d ever seen tears of joy so pure as the ones Kim’s mother let fall down her face, or the smile of relief Lorraine showed upon hearing the news. She looked over at Tom who was silently crying, taking a few deep breaths to compose himself, and then she stood there, looking at David, a look of relief on his face, as he let out a small laugh, one that represented how they all felt.

“God, I’ll kill her for scaring us all like that.” David’s Scottish accent becoming thicker as he spoke through the emotion he felt.

For the first time in hours, Julia let go of his hand, placing it on his back, hoping it would give him some more comfort, but it only lasted a second before they were back to holding hands.

Maybe, just maybe she would survive the scandal. So far, she’d survived everything, and if truth were to be told, it was all because they were holding hands.

**Author's Note:**

> I mean, it's not the happiest of endings, but anything is better than what actually happened, right?


End file.
